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	<title>Well of Being &#187; challenge</title>
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		<title>Life Loves You</title>
		<link>http://wellofbeing.ie/life-loves-you/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Nov 2015 20:07:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[sharon]]></dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://wellofbeing.ie/?p=318</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>I decided to accept a seven-day challenge given by Louise Hay and Robert Holden in their beautiful book Life Loves You: 7 Spiritual Practices to Heal Your Life.  Yesterday was Day 7 so today I&#8217;m going to tell you all about &#8230; <a class="more-link" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/life-loves-you/">read more<span class="meta-nav"></span></a></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/life-loves-you/">Life Loves You</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I decided to accept a seven-day challenge given by Louise Hay and Robert Holden in their beautiful book <em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1401946143/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=1401946143&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=bettethansurv-20&amp;linkId=ZJNHRASZVKHVUKWQ" target="_blank">Life Loves You: 7 Spiritual Practices to Heal Your Life.</a> </em></p>
<p>Yesterday was Day 7 so today I&#8217;m going to tell you all about this seemingly simple exercise that took me places I never expected&#8230;</p>
<p><span id="more-318"></span></p>
<p>Here&#8217;s the challenge (spiritual practice sounds nicer!):</p>
<p>Sit comfortably in front of a mirror. Inhale deeply. Say to yourself: <span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong><em>Life loves you</em> </strong></span>(or<em> <span style="color: #ff00ff;"><strong>Life loves me</strong></span></em>), then exhale. Repeat this 10 times. Notice your response each time. Pay attention to your bodily sensations, your thoughts and your feelings. Write these responses in a journal. Be honest. And please don&#8217;t judge yourself.</p>
<p>The second part of this exercise is to look into the mirror and repeat this affirmation: <em><span style="color: #0000ff;"><strong>I am willing to let life love me today.</strong></span> </em>Once again, notice your responses. Remember to breathe. Louise Hay and Robert Holden recommend repeating this affirmation until you feel &#8220;comfortable sensations in your body, light feelings in your heart, and a happy commentary in your thoughts.&#8221;</p>
<p>Repeat this exercise for seven consecutive days.</p>
<p>So I knuckle down and I do it. Seven days in a row.</p>
<p>There are tears. And sadness. Anger makes a surprise visit.</p>
<p>My inner child wails. Self-worth wavers. I judge.</p>
<p>I witness my beauty. And I feel the love.</p>
<div id="attachment_4943" style="width: 1930px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><img class=" size-full wp-image-4943 aligncenter" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/love-wallpapers-love-33002173-1920-1200.jpg?w=559" alt="Love-Wallpapers-love-33002173-1920-1200" width="1920" height="1200" data-wpmedia-src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/love-wallpapers-love-33002173-1920-1200.jpg" /><p class="wp-caption-text"><a href="images6.fanpop.com">images6.fanpop.com</a></p></div>
<p>Physically, I experience tension in my shoulders and I struggle to catch my breath. My head aches.</p>
<p>I notice a panicky feeling in my chest. My insides fizz.</p>
<p>Sometimes I become distracted by my thoughts, by my eyelashes, my hair, teeth and makeup. Fears arise.</p>
<p>Ideas spring forth. I want to share this exercise with as many people as possible.</p>
<p>I doubt that life loves me. I hope that it does. I believe that it could&#8230;</p>
<p>Interestingly, I find it easier to say <em>Life loves you </em>rather than <em>Life loves me. </em>It&#8217;s as if I&#8217;m two separate people &#8211; one a wiser, more evolved, peaceful, loving being; the other a wounded, scared child who needs reassurance.</p>
<p>I make myself look into my eyes as I cry the tears of a frightened child who feels all alone and just wants to be loved and protected. I&#8217;m there for myself in this moment.</p>
<p>I have the awareness that every time I lost hope, I left myself. I promise never to abandon myself again.</p>
<p>I feel a fierce determination to let life love me. Gradually, this determination transforms into something gentler, something more accepting, something more loving.</p>
<p>I realise that I close down whenever I fear rejection. I decide to open my heart, to let in the good, to love myself and, in doing that, to let life love me.</p>
<p>As I gaze into my eyes, I actually become quite mesmerised. I get lost in the colours and the inky blackness of my pupils as they dilate and contract.</p>
<div id="attachment_4961" style="width: 620px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><img class=" size-full wp-image-4961 aligncenter" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/sharon-vogiatzi-life-coach.jpg?w=559" alt="sharon vogiatzi life coach" width="610" height="406" data-wpmedia-src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/sharon-vogiatzi-life-coach.jpg" /><p class="wp-caption-text">favim.com</p></div>
<p>I recently started seeing an amazing guy who tells me how beautiful I am. As I stare at my reflection, I see what he sees. I can see the beauty in my eyes, the beauty in me.</p>
<p>By the end of these seven days, which are laden with emotion, insight and healing, I&#8217;m saying <em>Life loves you </em>and really meaning it. I&#8217;m also able to say <em>Life loves me </em>too. I feel happy, light and relaxed.</p>
<p>I could never have predicted what would have come up for me while completing this exercise. My inner child voiced how scared and alone she feels. So I started giving her the love, affection and reassurance that she needs.</p>
<p>It became clear that I regularly criticise and reject myself. I resolved to be there for myself and not to abandon myself any more.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m more aware of when I close off to others, to the world, to life and to myself. I&#8217;m going to give myself the love and care that I deserve. I know that I can make myself happy.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m happily choosing to open my heart. I can see the good in the universe. And everything that happens is a confirmation that life loves me. I just have to let life love me today. Because once I allow it, I can see it.</p>
<p>Since starting this challenge, I&#8217;ve been given countless proof that life loves me.</p>
<p>A sales assistant drops a free lip balm into my bag. Motorists let me pass. A barista draws a love heart in my latte. People smile at me.</p>
<div id="attachment_4939" style="width: 310px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><img class=" size-medium wp-image-4939 aligncenter" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/img_5756.jpg?w=300" alt="IMG_5756" width="300" height="300" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Image: Author&#8217;s Own</p></div>
<p>One morning, a friend gives me coffee, a <em>Mars </em>bar <em>and</em> a massage. Another friend gifts me with a red phone cover sporting a snowflake <em>and </em>a love heart. A loved one presses money into my hands for an upcoming trip.</p>
<p>And I can definitely feel the love with the guy I&#8217;m seeing. It&#8217;s in our hugs and our kisses, our texts and our glances. It flows in the things we share and the way we are with one another. My heart is so open when I&#8217;m with him and that feels really good.</p>
<p>This spiritual practice has shown me that I can feel this way all of the time, not just when I&#8217;m with a romantic partner. I can bring that openheartedness, warmth and affection to my interactions with other people too. And to the time I spend alone.</p>
<p>I greet people with a smile. I give people hugs and I&#8217;m present to what they share with me.</p>
<p>I listen to myself. I&#8217;m true to who I am and to what&#8217;s right for me. I&#8217;m nice to myself. And I appreciate life and all that it offers me in every single beautiful moment. <span style="color: #ff00ff;"><strong>Life loves me.</strong></span></p>
<p>And guess what? There&#8217;s an abundance of love to go around because life loves you too.</p>
<p>Want to make sure? Try out this exercise for seven consecutive days. Enjoy. And please let me know how you get on.</p>
<div id="attachment_4950" style="width: 503px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><img class=" size-full wp-image-4950 aligncenter" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/self-love.jpg" alt="self-love" width="493" height="537" /><p class="wp-caption-text">favim.com</p></div>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/life-loves-you/">Life Loves You</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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		<title>Open your Heart</title>
		<link>http://wellofbeing.ie/open-your-heart/</link>
		<comments>http://wellofbeing.ie/open-your-heart/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Sep 2015 23:35:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[sharon]]></dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://wellofbeing.ie/?p=294</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>A dear friend sent me a link to an interesting TED talk on love and relationships given by Mandy Len Catron. The theme of love and relationships had already been playing on my mind. After watching the clip, I confessed to my &#8230; <a class="more-link" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/open-your-heart/">read more<span class="meta-nav"></span></a></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/open-your-heart/">Open your Heart</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A dear friend sent me a link to an <a href="https://www.ted.com/talks/mandy_len_catron_falling_in_love_is_the_easy_part" target="_blank">interesting TED talk on love and relationships given by Mandy Len Catron.</a> The theme of love and relationships had already been playing on my mind.</p>
<p>After watching the clip, I confessed to my friend that I long to share intimacy and affection with someone of the male variety. I quickly added that I&#8217;m just feeling impatient and that I should simply be present.</p>
<p><span id="more-294"></span></p>
<p>My friend replied: &#8220;There&#8217;s nothing wrong with wanting to have a special connection with a man. What you mustn&#8217;t do is ever make yourself feel bad because that want is there. It&#8217;s human nature.&#8221; It was nice to read her words.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.ted.com/talks/mandy_len_catron_falling_in_love_is_the_easy_part" target="_blank">Mandy Len Catron&#8217;s TED talk</a> came about because Mandy, in the midst of a breakup, turned to science to better understand love. While researching the workings of the heart, Mandy discovered a study undertaken by psychologist Arthur Aron 20 years ago.</p>
<p>The study involved having two strangers ask and answer a series of 36 questions designed to make the participants fall in love. Six months later, the participants were married.</p>
<p>One evening, Mandy described Arthur Aron&#8217;s study to a university acquaintance. He proposed that they put the questions to the test. And they promptly fell in love!</p>
<p>Mandy went on to write an <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/modern-love-to-fall-in-love-with-anyone-do-this.html" target="_blank">article about her experience for <em>The New York Times.</em></a> Since then, she has received endless calls and emails from people who all want to know one thing: Are Mandy and her university acquaintance still together? And the answer is that they are.</p>
<p>This may seem like the happy ending that we&#8217;re all hoping for. But what Mandy learned from this incredible experience is that there is no happing ending. There is no ending.</p>
<p>Falling in love is the easy part. The challenge lies in the decision to continue loving each other through the good <em>and </em>the difficult times. The hard part is to allow yourself be vulnerable and to give your heart to someone who may or may not choose to love you back.</p>
<p>These are the parts of love that many single people forget about when we crave a relationship. We want the smiles and the glances, the cuddles and the kisses, the electricity of attraction and the rush of romance.</p>
<p>However, closeness with a partner can really trigger you and bring all your issues to the surface. The choice then is to succumb to the temptation to close your heart and retreat (or defend) <em>or</em> you can deal with these issues and expand, both as a human being <em>and </em>as a couple.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s exciting <em>and </em>scary to open your heart to another human being. Being loved can make you feel blissful and secure one moment and out of control the next.</p>
<div id="attachment_4745" style="width: 179px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-kildare3.jpg"><img class="wp-image-4745 size-medium" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-kildare3.jpg?w=169" alt="life coach kildare" width="169" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">favim.com</p></div>
<p>Today, I told another friend about all of this. She excitedly suggested that we ask one another the <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html" target="_blank">36 questions</a>. &#8220;Imagine if we fell in love,&#8221; she laughed.</p>
<p>My friend and I answered all 36 of Arthur Aron&#8217;s questions. The questions encouraged us to share our life stories, embarrassing incidents, favourite memories, fears, problems and dreams. We were also invited to tell each other what we liked about one another.</p>
<p>Did we fall in love? I can honestly say that my heart was bursting by the end of the exercise. In truth, my friend and I already love one another.</p>
<p>However, this exercise highlighted how much we have in common and how much we value our friendship. Being let into my friend&#8217;s life in this way deepened my love for her. Answering these questions also reminded me of how far I&#8217;ve come, how great my life is and how wonderful I am.</p>
<p>How do a series of questions make people fall in love? I believe that these questions inspire you to share yourself with another human being openly and honestly. This vulnerability allows someone to get to know the real you. And this can greatly speed up the falling in love process.</p>
<p>I&#8217;d definitely recommend completing this exercise, preferably with someone dishy. It may just make you fall in love &#8211; with your friend, your partner, or an attractive stranger. It may also make you fall in love with your journey, with your life, and with you, the real you.</p>
<div id="attachment_4749" style="width: 670px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/love_hearts_pair-3840x2160.jpg"><img class="wp-image-4749 size-large" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/love_hearts_pair-3840x2160.jpg?w=660" alt="hdwallpapers.in" width="660" height="371" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">hdwallpapers.in</p></div>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/open-your-heart/">Open your Heart</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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		<title>The Adventure</title>
		<link>http://wellofbeing.ie/the-adventure/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 07 Sep 2015 20:38:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[sharon]]></dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://wellofbeing.ie/?p=261</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>I awake several times in pain. I might still be able to fit in a workout tomorrow morning before my flight, I try to convince myself. The following morning, I can barely put weight on my foot. I had felt the twinges &#8230; <a class="more-link" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/the-adventure/">read more<span class="meta-nav"></span></a></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/the-adventure/">The Adventure</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I awake several times in pain. <em>I might still be able to fit in a workout tomorrow morning before my flight, </em>I try to convince myself.</p>
<p>The following morning, I can barely put weight on my foot. I had felt the twinges in a couple of fitness classes but had chosen to ignore them. I had pushed myself too hard and hadn&#8217;t listened to my body. <em>Maybe I need to become more balanced in my approach, </em>I muse philosophically while simultaneously huffing with resistance.</p>
<p><span id="more-261"></span></p>
<p><em>I might not be able to go to London, </em>I realise as my eyes well up. This is closely followed by another thought: <em>I&#8217;ve been feeling great exercising and now it&#8217;s being taken away from me. It&#8217;s not fair. I want to look and feel good. </em>Oh dear, there&#8217;s clearly more I need to learn here.</p>
<p>Of course, exercise is good for me and it&#8217;s important to take action and do the things that are beneficial for my physical and mental well-being. I honestly thought I&#8217;d been doing great but, now that I can&#8217;t exercise, I immediately feel less good about myself. I have formed an attachment to exercising as an external source of happiness and self-worth.</p>
<p>I know I have the potential to feel good <strong>no matter what</strong>. I just have to figure out how.</p>
<div id="attachment_4692" style="width: 620px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-and-acupuncturist-kildare1.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-4692" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-and-acupuncturist-kildare1.jpg" alt="favim.com" width="610" height="381" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">favim.com</p></div>
<p>The next few days are filled with learning and awareness. A friend comes over and I instruct her as to where to place acupuncture needles.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s interesting to have to ask for help, to be on the receiving end of such care, and to experience the magic of acupuncture when I really need it. I&#8217;m delighted to discover that I&#8217;m able to tell my friend where the energy meridians are merely by feeling where they are in my own body.</p>
<p>Afterwards I notice that, as I hobble around the kitchen, I&#8217;m repeating the mantra: <em>I am amazing. </em>I&#8217;m not forcing myself to do it. It&#8217;s coming naturally. All those affirmations I&#8217;ve been saying are clearly paying dividends.</p>
<p>I&#8217;e resigned myself to cancelling my trip to London when I ring my mother who&#8217;s a nurse. She speaks to a physiotherapist who assures her that if I collect crutches on my way to the airport, there should be no reason that I can&#8217;t fly to England.</p>
<p><em>I&#8217;m going, </em>I resolve. I feel strong and excited.</p>
<p>My friend very kindly offers to drive me. We grab the crutches and an hour later I&#8217;m making my way to Departures. I&#8217;ve never used crutches before and I&#8217;m surprised to learn how energy-consuming they are.</p>
<p>A member of staff approaches me to offer me a wheelchair. I say yes. What a weird experience!</p>
<p>Suddenly, I&#8217;m at a different level to everyone else. Most people don&#8217;t look at me. Others stare at me with what I presume to be pity in their eyes.</p>
<p>Now that it <em>i</em><em>sn&#8217;t</em> happening, I realise that men usually look at me as I walk past. This afternoon, I feel invisible to some and as obvious as a clown in Mecca to others. I certainly don&#8217;t feel very sexy.</p>
<p>I haven&#8217;t had time to wash my hair. And I&#8217;m wearing runners as they&#8217;re the only footwear that don&#8217;t hurt too much. I&#8217;m unable to drag along a suitcase so I&#8217;ve packed the bare minimum into a small backpack. <a href="http://betterthansurviving.me/2015/09/01/just-doing-it/" target="_blank">Talk about hurling myself out of my comfort zone in so many different ways!</a></p>
<p>I&#8217;m transferred from the wheelchair to a buggy then deposited at my gate. One of my favourite things to do in an airport, or anywhere really, is to go for coffee. But I wouldn&#8217;t be able to carry a cup while on crutches.</p>
<p>I hop over to a café anyway and ask the barista if she could bring a latte to my seat for me. She gladly obliges.</p>
<p>Last Christmas, I presented my friend with <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1401918298/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=1401918298&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=bettethansurv-20&amp;linkId=HN4ESN5IZ34ZVCJZ" target="_blank">a wonderful book by Cheryl Richardson called <em>The Art of Extreme Self-Care</em></a>. Each month, a few of us meet to read a chapter together, set some goals, and find out how we got on with the previous month&#8217;s challenge.</p>
<p>A couple of months ago, we did a chapter on taking your hands off the wheel, letting go of control and <strong>asking for help. </strong>Last month, my friends asked me how I&#8217;d done.</p>
<p>I reported being aware of when I&#8217;m being controlling. I admitted that I hadn&#8217;t actually asked for help but that I hadn&#8217;t <em>needed</em> to. Now, I&#8217;m eating my words.</p>
<p>When it&#8217;s time to board, I&#8217;m escorted down to the plane and up to my seat. When we arrive in London, I&#8217;m put in a wheelchair and wheeled to the bus terminal.</p>
<p>By the time I meet my friend at Victoria Coach Station, I&#8217;m exhausted and emotional. We have a catch-up and a quiet night in.</p>
<div id="attachment_4694" style="width: 510px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-and-acupuncturist-kildare2.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-4694" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-and-acupuncturist-kildare2.jpg" alt="katimorton.com" width="500" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">katimorton.com</p></div>
<p>The next morning, I&#8217;m ready to manoeuvre the London public transport system on crutches.</p>
<p>Hobbling slowly through a tube station when everyone else is speeding is an interesting experience. I have to be okay with going at a certain pace. I have to take it one slow step at a time.</p>
<p>The kindness I receive from people who hold open doors, carry my crutches as I make my way down the stairs, and give me their seats on the Underground is really heart-warming. I&#8217;ve never said &#8220;thank you&#8221; so much in my entire life.</p>
<p>I spend all day Saturday at a <em>Hay House: I Can Do It! </em>conference. One of the first things the <a href="http://www.robertholden.org/about-robert/" target="_blank">beautiful speaker Robert Holden</a> speaks about is self-image. Perfect!</p>
<p>Robert describes how infants, up until the age of 18 months, don&#8217;t recognise themselves in the mirror. They have not yet identified themselves with their bodies. Robert surmises that babies are still identifying with something greater &#8211; the very essence of their being.</p>
<p>This is something I need to connect with more &#8211; my soul. I am more than just my body.</p>
<p>So when I can&#8217;t exercise, when I&#8217;m on crutches, in runners, with unwashed hair, I can still love and accept myself and feel the energy of my amazing spirit.</p>
<p>Subsequently, Robert shows us <a href="https://vimeo.com/69165167" target="_blank">a lovely ad that he was involved in making.</a></p>
<p><iframe src="https://player.vimeo.com/video/69165167" width="1000" height="563" frameborder="0" title="Dove - Camera Shy" webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
<p>Robert also teaches us that being too independent and trying to force things to happen exactly as we want them to is not allowing life to flow. He says:</p>
<blockquote>
<p style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong>&#8220;If we stick with independence, often we&#8217;re running on adrenaline and not grace.&#8221;</strong></span></p>
</blockquote>
<p>I sit back and allow life to flow because, right now, I can do very little else. And it feels good. I experience a sense of peace as I breathe a sigh of relief.</p>
<p>An excellent question Robert poses is the following:</p>
<blockquote>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: #0000ff;">&#8220;If I could let life love me even more, what great things could happen?&#8221;</span></strong></p>
</blockquote>
<p>Tears spill down my cheeks as I contemplate this.</p>
<p>During the break, <a href="http://betterthansurviving.me/2015/09/01/just-doing-it/" target="_blank">remembering my vow to take myself out of my comfort zone</a>, and <a href="http://betterthansurviving.me/2013/02/19/everyone-everyone/" target="_blank">recalling how I definitely didn&#8217;t do so at the last <em>Hay House: I Can Do It! </em>conference I attended</a>, I purchase <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1401946143/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=1401946143&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=bettethansurv-20&amp;linkId=726JHFAPN7BL54AQ" target="_blank">Robert Holden and Louise Hay&#8217;s book </a><em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1401946143/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=1401946143&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=bettethansurv-20&amp;linkId=726JHFAPN7BL54AQ" target="_blank">Life Loves You: 7 Spiritual Practices to Heal Your Life</a>. </em>I then join a queue to have Robert sign my book.</p>
<p>I take this incredible opportunity to tell Robert how much I love him, how wonderful his talk was and how much I enjoy his radio show. I even get my picture taken with him. Go me!</p>
<div id="attachment_4696" style="width: 510px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/img_5305.jpg"><img class="wp-image-4696 size-large" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/img_5305.jpg?w=500" alt="IMG_5305" width="500" height="434" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Pictorial evidence</p></div>
<p>I meet some lovely people at this inspiring event. One woman insists on buying me a coffee and carrying it back to the conference centre for me. And <em>Hay House </em>author Susan Lander approaches me to give me a free signed copy of<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1401945376/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=1401945376&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=bettethansurv-20&amp;linkId=MIHBH7RVBXQ6IOGL" target="_blank"> her book <em>Conversations with History</em>.</a></p>
<p>Despite all the learning, awareness and random acts of kindness, I decide that I&#8217;ve had enough of the crutches. It takes so much effort and energy to use them. My arms are paining me. And I want to be seen as a &#8220;normal&#8221; 35-year old woman again.</p>
<p>Thankfully, I&#8217;m reminded by <a href="http://www.tut.com/about/mikedooley/" target="_blank">inspirational author and speaker Mike Dooley</a> that everything happens for a reason. Mike likens life to a three-hour car ride.</p>
<p>Before this car ride, you decide where you want to go. You type your destination into the GPS system, or Divine Intelligence as he calls it. Then, you have to put your car into gear and drive.</p>
<p>For that three-hour journey, you may not know where you&#8217;re going. You may feel lost and the whole experience might feel weird. You may even take a few wrong turns but the GPS always recalibrates. And you don&#8217;t know if the GPS has worked until you get there.</p>
<p>Mike then describes a baby learning how to walk. The child takes a couple of steps before it keels over. The parents don&#8217;t start shouting at the child, telling him that he deserves it or that he brought it on himself. This child clearly has a desire to walk. And his parents recognise that falling down is part of the child&#8217;s journey.</p>
<p>After a great conference, yummy food, lots of adventures outside of my comfort zone, and quality time spent with friends, I leave London with a knowing that everything is unfolding perfectly. I resist nothing. I allow life to flow.</p>
<p>Before I arrive at Stansted airport, my mother texts offering to collect me from the airport. And I take her up on that offer.</p>
<p>I now have a greater understanding of how people must feel when they&#8217;re injured or incapacitated. From now on, I&#8217;m going to be more mindful of offering help to people when I&#8217;m in a position to do so as I can attest to how much it&#8217;s appreciated.</p>
<p>Today, my foot is almost all better. I&#8217;ve learnt many lessons from this injury. Some of which I didn&#8217;t want to have to learn. But learn I must if I want to move forward.</p>
<p>The GPS recalibrates and onwards I stride.</p>
<div id="attachment_4690" style="width: 410px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-and-acupuncturist-kildare.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-4690" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coach-and-acupuncturist-kildare.jpg" alt="tumblr.com" width="400" height="393" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">tumblr.com</p></div>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/the-adventure/">The Adventure</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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		<title>Just Doing It</title>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Sep 2015 20:39:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[sharon]]></dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://wellofbeing.ie/?p=259</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m currently making my way through Susan Jeffers&#8217; bestseller Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. So far, I&#8217;ve learned that there&#8217;s no point in waiting for the fear to subside before you tackle something. There&#8217;s also no sense in assuming that none of those &#8230; <a class="more-link" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/just-doing-it/">read more<span class="meta-nav"></span></a></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/just-doing-it/">Just Doing It</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m currently making my way through <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0345487427/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=0345487427&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=bettethansurv-20&amp;linkId=ARERKDKGAGWMJI7K" target="_blank">Susan Jeffers&#8217; bestseller <em>Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway</em></a>. So far, I&#8217;ve learned that there&#8217;s no point in waiting for the fear to subside <em>before </em>you tackle something.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s also no sense in assuming that none of those successful people out there experience fear. They do. To quote the book title, they feel the fear&#8230; and do it anyway.</p>
<p><span id="more-259"></span></p>
<p>I know somebody who&#8217;s recently got a big job promotion. She admitted to me that she doesn&#8217;t know what she&#8217;s doing. Nonetheless, she&#8217;s doing it. And the likelihood is that this daunting place she&#8217;s now in will soon become a comfort zone. As the saying goes, you&#8217;ve just got to fake it &#8217;til you make it.</p>
<p>Susan Jeffers suggests doing one thing each day that takes you out of your comfort zone. Because the place outside of that zone is where you&#8217;re challenged to grow.</p>
<p>That magical place is where opportunity manifests. And the contentment (or misery) that you were once resigned to transforms into an energy and fulfilment that you could never have imagined.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve decided to accept Susan&#8217;s challenge. So far, the things I&#8217;ve done aren&#8217;t particularly dramatic. But they&#8217;re getting me used to changing my perspective, pushing myself and trying different things.</p>
<p>In the last week, I&#8217;ve showered at the gym and done my makeup in the communal mirrors (my comfort zone would be to come straight home after a workout). I took myself to a different venue for coffee and I drove somewhere new.</p>
<p>A couple of nights ago, I spotted an interesting man on an online dating website. Out of habit, I exited his profile.</p>
<p><em>I don&#8217;t initiate conversation with men,</em> I thought.<em> That&#8217;s their role. They prefer the chase. And that suits me because I don&#8217;t have to risk rejection.</em></p>
<p>Then I remembered my vow to feel the fear and do it anyway. So I messaged him. I haven&#8217;t heard back from him. The ego took a slight kick to the nads but that&#8217;s all in a day&#8217;s work for a fear-feeling go-getter.</p>
<p>And over the weekend, I used the gym (fitness classes are my comfort zone). I even requested an assessment with a trainer who could design a programme for me. The receptionist booked me in for an appointment with <a href="http://betterthansurviving.me/2015/08/24/the-calm-during-the-storm/" target="_blank">an instructor who I really fancy.</a></p>
<p>This morning, my fit fitness instructor took me to a private room where I had to take off my shoes and socks (I&#8217;m very self-conscious about my feet). He weighed me and told me how fat I am (well, the percentage of fat in my body).</p>
<p>Then, he devised me a programme and showed me how to do all the exercises. I thoroughly enjoyed watching him work (yes, I&#8217;m a total perv!)</p>
<div id="attachment_4676" style="width: 274px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coaching-kildare.jpg"><img class="wp-image-4676 size-medium" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/09/life-coaching-kildare.jpg?w=264" alt="I just got motivated." width="264" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">I just got motivated.</p></div>
<p>In other news, I was very saddened yesterday to hear of inspirational speaker and author Dr Wayne W. Dyer&#8217;s passing. Wayne Dyer was my first introduction to the self-help genre. I got so much from his talks and radio shows. He was a truly excellent speaker.</p>
<p>A few years ago, I attended <a href="http://betterthansurviving.me/2013/02/19/everyone-everyone/" target="_blank">an event in Glasgow</a> that Wayne spoke at. During the lunch break, my friends approached the speakers with books for them to sign. Striking up conversation with these people was something I shied away from so I took myself for a walk instead. After lunch, my colleagues gushed about meeting Wayne Dyer and the other amazing speakers.</p>
<p>And during my very first Life Coaching session with a fellow student, a suggestion was made that I contact Wayne Dyer and ask for advice on my business. I recoiled from the idea and never followed through.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m not beating myself up now for missing these opportunities but Wayne Dyer&#8217;s passing has highlighted the importance of embracing the moment rather than shrinking from it.</p>
<p>Wayne Dyer did so much good with his life. He helped and inspired so many people. He wasn&#8217;t afraid to shine his charismatic light that illuminated the way for so many others. Or maybe he <em>was</em> afraid. But he did it anyway. Thank you, Wayne. All my love.</p>
<p>Feeling the fear and doing it anyway opens up your world to an abundance of happiness, scariness, rejection, excitement, achievement, failure, success, growth, learning and fulfilment.</p>
<p>All you have to do is acknowledge the voice that constantly denies and declines, warns and negates. Realise that it&#8217;s perfectly normal to be afraid. Then muster up the courage to propel yourself out of your comfort zone and into the unknown.</p>
<p>So my advice is to feel the fear and go do it anyway. You&#8217;ve more to lose by <em>not </em>doing it.</p>
<p>You may think you know best but all you know is what you think you already know. However, when you plunge into the unknown, you know nothing. And that&#8217;s when the world knows better. So life gets better. <em>You</em> get better.</p>
<p><iframe width="1000" height="563" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/2QRuAFkRs3Y?feature=oembed" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/just-doing-it/">Just Doing It</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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		<title>Basic Human Needs</title>
		<link>http://wellofbeing.ie/basic-human-needs/</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 10 Apr 2015 19:15:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[sharon]]></dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://wellofbeing.ie/?p=221</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Last night, I read Marianne Power&#8217;s most recent post on the six basic human needs. Yes, it may seem like I&#8217;ve become obsessed with this woman and maybe I have. But not in a lesbian way. In an admiring, respecting, fellow-blogger-and-self-help-enthusiast way. &#8230; <a class="more-link" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/basic-human-needs/">read more<span class="meta-nav"></span></a></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/basic-human-needs/">Basic Human Needs</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Last night, I read Marianne Power&#8217;s <a href="http://helpmeblog.net/i-want-to-be-significant/" target="_blank">most recent post on the six basic human needs.</a> Yes, it may seem like I&#8217;ve become obsessed with this woman and maybe I have. But not in a lesbian way. In an admiring, respecting, fellow-blogger-and-self-help-enthusiast way.</p>
<p>Anyway, I found Marianne&#8217;s post really interesting. Marianne is regurgitating self-improvement guru Tony Robbins&#8217; work and I, in turn, am regurgitating Marianne&#8217;s work. But we&#8217;re all putting our own spin, experience and insights into it.</p>
<p><span id="more-221"></span></p>
<p>So here&#8217;s my take on Marianne Power&#8217;s take on Tony Robbins&#8217; take on the six basic human needs. First of all, let me give you the six basic human needs, in Marianne&#8217;s words:</p>
<p><em><strong>&#8220;Need 1: Certainty/Comfort<br />
</strong></em>Our need to feel in control and secure.<em><strong><br />
<strong>Need 2: Uncertainty/Variety</strong><br />
</strong></em>Our need for variety, surprises.<em><strong><br />
<strong>Need 3: Significance</strong><br />
</strong></em>We all need to feel important, special, unique, or needed – some of us get a feeling of significance from our work, some do it by having a flash car or by getting a thousand Twitter followers. You can get significance by having more or bigger problems than anybody else (moi) and criminals get it by the attention they get for their crimes.<em><strong><br />
<strong>Need 4: Love &amp; Connection</strong><br />
</strong></em>We all need love but many of us are terrified of it and settle for connection, through our romantic relationships, friendships, our pets, walking through nature.<em><strong><br />
<strong>Need 5: Growth</strong><br />
</strong></em>If you’re not growing, you’re dying – whether that’s growing your business, your relationships, your education etc.<em><strong><br />
<strong>Need 6: Contribution</strong><br />
</strong></em>‘Life’s not about me; it’s about we,’ says Tony, who reckons that giving is what life’s all about.&#8221;</p>
<p>Marianne suggests (or maybe it was Tony Robbins who suggested it but I can&#8217;t keep up) asking yourself the following question:</p>
<p><strong>OUT OF THE SIX HUMAN NEEDS WHICH TWO HAVE YOU BEEN VALUING THE MOST?</strong></p>
<p>For me, Significance has definitely been one of my biggest needs. I want to feel special and I get that feeling by writing this blog, taking selfies, getting likes on <em>Facebook,</em> doing well in school and college,<em> </em>and having men fancy me. I like to be liked. I love to be loved. And I want other people to think I&#8217;m nice, pretty, talented, funny and desirable.</p>
<p>Love and Connection is also high on my list of priorities. I don&#8217;t feel comfortable unless I&#8217;m connecting. I achieve this connection by communicating with others, meditating, and communing with nature. I seek connection through affection, intimacy and even technology. And through all this connection, what I&#8217;m really hoping to experience is love. Pure, beautiful, all-encompassing, unconditional love.</p>
<p>The next question is: <strong>WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES OF VALUING THOSE NEEDS?</strong></p>
<p>The consequences I face are feelings of sadness, loneliness, rejection and depression when I delude myself that I&#8217;m alone, insignificant and unloved. I don&#8217;t deal well with criticism. And rejection is almost physical in its ability to wound me (hopefully not for much longer as I&#8217;m participating in this <a href="http://betterthansurviving.me/2015/04/03/oh-danny-boy/" target="_blank">Rejection Therapy game</a>).</p>
<p>In order to protect myself from the shadow side of significance, love and connection, I withdraw. I shut down. Or I try to be perfect because I convince myself that no one will love me otherwise.</p>
<p>Now, ask yourself: <strong>WHAT WOULD BE YOUR TOP TWO NEEDS NOW FOR YOUR LIFE TO TRANSFORM? </strong></p>
<p>For my life to transform, I have to prioritise Growth. Growth keeps you moving, learning, improving and evolving.</p>
<p>When I stop being so hard on myself, I can acknowledge that I actually am growing in all areas of my life. I&#8217;m attending courses, seeing a Life Coach, reading, making progress in my career, and changing the way I relate with life, other people and, most importantly, myself.</p>
<p>I also choose to focus on Contribution. Significance brings up a competitive streak in me. It&#8217;s all about being better, smarter and prettier. The need for significance fuels a striving to be more popular, more talented, more successful, more loved.</p>
<p>But life isn&#8217;t meant to be a competition. We&#8217;re all in this together. To be really spiritual about it, we&#8217;re all one.</p>
<p>Once I understand that, I want to cooperate and collaborate rather than compete. I want to help and share and give.</p>
<p>Tony Robbins says that Growth and Contribution are the needs that make you happy and fulfilled. He calls them Spiritual Needs, while the first four are the Needs of the Personality.</p>
<p>I actually felt chuffed that I&#8217;d got it &#8220;right&#8221;. There I go racing back to my need for Significance. But I&#8217;m aware of my tendencies now and the reasons behind them. I&#8217;m learning. There&#8217;s growth in that. And I&#8217;m sharing all of this with you guys. So I&#8217;m contributing.</p>
<div id="attachment_4505" style="width: 310px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/04/img_4359.jpg"><img class="wp-image-4505 size-medium" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/04/img_4359.jpg?w=300" alt="Random image of my friend and I dancing on a mountaintop" width="300" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Random image of my friend and I dancing on a mountaintop</p></div>
<p>Now to go off on a completely different tangent, today I remembered Marianne&#8217;s challenge to smile at strangers. I thought: <em>That&#8217;s easy. I&#8217;m always smiling at strangers. </em></p>
<p>Until I walked past an attractive man on a bridge this morning. I considered smiling at him but he was scowling. Cool, handsome scowling but scowling nonetheless.</p>
<p>I realised that smiling at strangers isn&#8217;t easy at all. I found it hard to look at this man, let alone smile at him.</p>
<p>I&#8217;d love to tell you that I felt the fear and smiled anyway. But I didn&#8217;t. I bottled it. But I <em>did </em>look at him, which is more than I&#8217;d have done before. Baby steps.</p>
<p>Another realisation I had on that bridge is that it&#8217;s easy to smile at strangers when they&#8217;re already smiling. Handsome, scowling men don&#8217;t invite smiles. But smiley, kind-faced people do. So I think we should all smile more.</p>
<p>And to waffle on for just a little longer, after last night&#8217;s post on wanting men to beat down my door (metaphorically of course), I received a random text from a man I went on a date with once. This &#8220;putting it out there to the Universe&#8221; stuff might actually work.</p>
<p>So, here goes&#8230; <em>Are you listening, Universe?</em> I would like a successful career that I love and that helps others to be all that they can be. I would like an abundant, happy life filled with peace, love, fun, laughter, beauty, friendship, enjoyment and adventure.</p>
<p>While I&#8217;m at it, I would like to be financially secure, own a great house, and go on lots of amazing holidays around the world. I would like health, wealth and well-being for myself and all my friends and family and the whole wide world.</p>
<p>And if you&#8217;re still listening Universe, I would like to get swept off my feet by (and have a healthy, wonderful relationship with) an older, available but equally smouldering version of Zayn Malik.</p>
<div id="attachment_4503" style="width: 670px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><a href="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/04/zayn-malik-glostick_940x526.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-4503" src="https://betterthansurviving.files.wordpress.com/2015/04/zayn-malik-glostick_940x526.jpg" alt="Even if he is scowling." width="660" height="369" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Even if he is scowling.</p></div>
<p>Image of Zayn Malik: www.heatworld.com</p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/basic-human-needs/">Basic Human Needs</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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		<title>Whirlwind</title>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 26 Nov 2014 17:36:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[sharon]]></dc:creator>
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		<category><![CDATA[Qualified Acupuncturist Kildare]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[<p>The last couple of months have been challenging. A whirlwind of emotion has been spinning forcefully within me. The intensity of these feelings has scared me. I&#8217;ve fumed with anger, cracked under pressure, retreated in fear, and battled against exhaustion. Today, &#8230; <a class="more-link" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/whirlwind/">read more<span class="meta-nav"></span></a></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/whirlwind/">Whirlwind</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The last couple of months have been challenging. A whirlwind of emotion has been spinning forcefully within me. The intensity of these feelings has scared me. I&#8217;ve fumed with anger, cracked under pressure, retreated in fear, and battled against exhaustion.</p>
<p>Today, a dear friend sent me this passage written by spiritual teacher and author Jeff Foster:</p>
<p><span id="more-281"></span></p>
<blockquote><p><strong>Your feelings, the energies alive in your body right now, were not &#8217;caused&#8217; by anyone else, and nobody else can take them away.</strong></p>
<p><strong>Nobody else is responsible for your feelings. This realisation can end the blame game once and for all, and leave you standing in your true place of power &#8211; the present moment.</strong></p>
<p><strong>Making others responsible for how we feel is the beginning of all violence, both internal and external, all conflict between people, and ultimately all wars between nations.</strong></p>
<p><strong>Let others off the hook. Honour what is alive in you right now. Learn to hold your own feelings like beloved children, however intensely they burn and scream for attention. Celebrate the aliveness in your hurt, the vibrancy of your disappointment, the electricity of your sadness. Kneel before the power in your anger, honour its burning creativity.</strong></p>
<p><strong>From this place of deep acceptance, you do not become weak and passive. Quite the opposite. You simply enter the world from a place of nonviolence, and therefore immense creative power, and you are open to the possibility of deep listening, honest dialogue, and unexpected change.</strong></p>
<p><strong>In suffering you become small. In love, anything is possible.</strong></p></blockquote>
<p>Of course, I knew these words were true. But I also felt strangely annoyed by them. Because I can&#8217;t hold anybody else responsible for how I&#8217;m feeling. I am not a victim.</p>
<p>Blaming other people or situations may seem like the easy option. It can be comforting to be able to vent to a friend. And it can feel nice to have somebody take your side, bestow you with sympathy, and agree that the other person is wrong. After all, the ego loves to be right.</p>
<p>I had convinced myself that I can&#8217;t be at peace until this problem is resolved. That I can&#8217;t be happy unless he/she changes. And that I can&#8217;t go after what I want in life when I&#8217;m trapped by this situation. Hip-high in resistance, I&#8217;ve been wading against the flow of life.</p>
<p>However, today&#8217;s message has hit home for me. I&#8217;ve realised that if I keep raging and complaining, I&#8217;ll only be stoking the fires of this energy. I&#8217;ll become a casualty of my ego. A slave to circumstance.</p>
<p>Tonight, as I lay my head on the pillow, thoughts of my current predicament come to mind. A swirl of emotion begins to rise up in me. Then, I remember Jeff Foster&#8217;s words. <span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong>Blame nobody.</strong></span></p>
<p>There may be a whirlwind howling right outside my door. But I am not the whirlwind. And I am not <em>in</em> the whirlwind. I can see it and hear it and it scares me senseless on occasion. But it&#8217;s not to blame. It&#8217;s a whirlwind. And whirlwinds do as whirlwinds do.</p>
<p>And when the whirlwind spins a destructive path across my world, I&#8217;ll join the dance. When it rips things apart and flings them aside, I&#8217;ll bow down in gratitude. Because those things to which I&#8217;ve formed deep attachments actually need to be destroyed.</p>
<p>So I close my eyes and listen to it howl.</p>
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<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie/whirlwind/">Whirlwind</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="http://wellofbeing.ie">Well of Being</a>.</p>
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